Purpose

February 12, 2024

 

We walked out to our lake on our property yesterday to check levels because we have had almost 2 feet of rain in a matter of 2 weeks.  We have not been able to get back there on the ATV because we didn’t want to tear things up in the muddy mess.  So, we walked it and It was pretty magical, I must say.

Last summer, Texas experienced horrendous heat and drought.  Our two ponds and our lake struggled. Seeing them overflowing the banks, is pure delight.  They are cleansed and inviting again! 

But that isn’t what this post is about. 

As we were standing there, gazing, I looked at the canoe. It is resting upside down by the overflowing banks.  As I looked at its faded greed appearance while gazing over the lake, I was moved unexpectedly in my emotions.  I thought, “Oh the stories you could tell.”

That boat has been in existence since the 90’s.  It has had young to old in it, where laughter, fishing, and probably some secrets have been shared while sitting aboard the now decaying vessel.  Now, after many years, it has weathered and developed a serious crack, whispering its days of pressing through the waters have come to an end.  It felt melancholy to me, as I stared at it.

I feel the same way when I see an abandoned house in the countryside.  I think so often about who might have lived there, the joys and sorrows of their lives, now hidden in the remnants of the caving roof  and hollow walls of yesteryears.  I feel a sadness in my soul.

Beyond that, however, I also feel deeply compelled by the recognition of those things, to be motivated myself to continue to live purposefully in the joys and the sorrows while I can, because, as this old canoe reminded me yet again, life is but a vapor, so we must seize every moment we can.

I began to look instantly to the canoe, and shift my mindset. If I am going to seize the day surrounding this canoe that can no longer journey us through waters, what can it become? By shifting my mindset, I began to get giddy at the ideas for what it CAN be rather than what it can no longer accomplish! When my mindset shifted, so did my emotions towards the old canoe!

I plan to leave the old canoe right where it is.  I eagerly now see it as a staple point to begin a new purpose.  I will plant flowers around it, build a bench beside it, as a reminder to myself and anyone who comes to sit by our lake, that today is a gift.  We must choose to engage in the moments we have, knowing with each one that passes, it is gone.  We cannot live backwards.  Yet, we can always cherish where we have been!

That isn’t always easy.  Sometimes we already feel it is too late.  We feel stuck, cracked, and faded in our circumstances.  Belief systems then form around those feelings and it becomes suffocating to try to hope for anything more. 

Can I tell you, though, feelings lie!  We may feel a certain way, but that doesn’t mean it is true.. it just means we feel.  Learning to live outside our feelings, while still validating they exist, are very real, and deserve acknowledgment takes effort and intentionality. It takes processing, reminding, and digging deep; and honestly, it sometimes it takes a neutral support system. 

If you find yourself lost in your circumstances, and the feelings seem louder than hope, reach out and find support.  Whether it is a friend, a family member, or reaching out here for counseling support, you deserve to reach the place where you are thankful for the cracks because they came from a life well lived… and still being lived. 

This canoe had one purpose for a long time.  Yesterday, I became super excited when I started seeing the new purpose that is just beginning, built on the truth of where that canoe has been and where it can be now. 

The same can be true for me, and the same can be true for you!

With gratitude,

 

Robin

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