Where you are…
Today I spent time rounding up our bull, Charlie. He had escaped the fence again and was headed towards danger. Of course, he chose to do this in a down pour just to really make It exciting. As we got to him and worked him back towards the fence, when he saw the gate and his herd, he was eager to return. He went right in and all but took a sigh of relief that he was safe and sound with his ladies again. As I watched him for a bit, of course I found a lesson in it. Nature has a way of speaking life lessons into my awareness. I think sometimes I learn more from my animals than I ever could from academia.
Today, as I sat and watched him a bit, noticing his relief and the celebration of his homecoming by his herd, I wanted to kick his tail and say, “Why did you leave them in the first place?” He is so happy to be back there, but then once he is there, he starts becoming curious about the literal other side of the fence. Charlie forgets to be grateful for what he has, it seems. He gets comfortable in his safety and decides to shake things up, and then from what I can tell from his behavior, he regrets it almost immediately. The lesson?
Don’t be like Charlie!
Life is hard and it will never be perfect where we are standing. We can always look and find things that are broken, off, or wrong in some way. Then, we can peer into the distance of someone else’s world and believe they have it better. The art of comparison comes so easily, especially these days with social media and everything at the tip of our fingers. The thing is, however, what we see from our limited view about those situations doesn’t necessarily give us the full picture.
For Charlie, he isn’t thinking about how lonely it will feel to be separated from his herd. He isn’t thinking about the round bale at his disposal and the protection having that fence provides. He is just thinking there “might” be greener grass over there. Then he gets there, he is alone and vulnerable, the grass isn’t any better and there is no hay or protein licks, and danger is all around.
That isn’t much different than us, if we think about it, when we are comparing ourselves to others. We have no idea what emotional, financial, physical, spiritual, or environmental struggles “the other side” is experiencing. We can’t know because it isn’t our reality. While we may think someone with the bigger house, better car, skinner body, stronger muscles, louder laugh, perfect pictures…. I could keep going but you get it… what we aren’t seeing: the inner struggle, the phone calls from debt collectors, the fear of rejection that requires looking perfect, the stress of competing to stay “the best”, the lack of emotional support, the depression camouflaged by the smiles… on and on and on.
So today, as Charlie settles back in with his herd, I challenged myself and now each of you as well, to settle where we are right now. Instead of wishing for something on the other side of the fence, let’s just keep putting in the work on our side of the fence. If you don’t like something, put your focus into improving that… seek counseling, eat better, practice gratitude, set boundaries, remove obstacles, identify your worth, feed your mind, body, and soul, and refrain from comparing.
Breath, dig in, and LIVE!
sincerely,
Robin